


Hold Me

by beautifulconcordia



Series: Wine and Cigarettes [1]
Category: Broadchurch
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-05
Updated: 2019-04-27
Packaged: 2019-10-04 23:27:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17313842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beautifulconcordia/pseuds/beautifulconcordia
Summary: Beth has been through a lot this past year.





	1. Coming Home

**Author's Note:**

> It’s been over a year and a half since I’ve written Broadchurch. Might not be a one shot, it will depend on where I want to go with it.

Beth wasn’t sure she wanted to keep this child.

Birthed out of grief stricken sex and two parents who don’t plan on being together much longer, she didn’t think it was the best environment to put a baby through. This child would likely be a child of divorced parents before it was even out of the womb. Mark wanted her to keep it, but she was wrought with grief, emotionally charged, and spent her days in bed. How could she do this to another child? She already has seen the effects on their teenage daughter, but an infant? Infants are impressionable. Nearly sixteen years earlier as a young teen, she recalls finding herself pregnant with Mark’s child. They were young, she still in sixth form, and he was out of school, working in a shop. She recalls being upset when she got the pregnancy test from the drug store. She bawled when she saw the plus sign on the stick, but she remembered the feeling of holding Chloe in her arms. The baby smell. The struggles to make ends meet with both parents working to make sure Chloe had the best. Finishing school, whilst taking care of a baby. Now nearing her mid thirties, she was sure she could do it again, but with all this tragedy and stress put upon their family, she worried for the baby. And herself.

Smiling weakly, she then cradles the small swell, and sighs. It had been months since Danny was murdered. She still struggled everyday to keep going, to keep living. Everything reminds her of Danny in their home. His room still stands, and she hadn’t yet packed it all away. She buries herself in her bed and cried while Chloe was in school. Beth had almost no friends she could confide in, they distanced themselves during the trial and she grew distrust because she was backstabbed many times over by the very people she thought were friends. Ellie was the only one left...but even she pushed her away at times. Deep down she knew it was not Ellie’s fault, how could she have known? But grief turned her anger outward.

Beth reminds herself that Ellie didn’t know about Joe. Ellie spent more time at work than at home, and didn’t know all the goings on. 

This all went under her nose, and to this day she still constantly apologizes to Beth. Beth would remind Ellie was that it wasn’t her fault and that she wasn’t responsible. Then Ellie would remind her that it was under her own roof, and wished over and over that she would have played detective a little more often at home. To which Beth would tell her once again that she couldn’t have known, and she would take her in her arms and they would have a good cry. Holding each other for what seemed like hours. This occurred over a span of months. One day, their eyes met in a longing gaze. Beth leaned forward, planting a kiss on Ellie’s lips. The woman, much to her surprise didn’t flinch. Instead, she returns the kiss, her fingers running through Beth’s messy hair. Her palm rested against Beth’s cheek, stroking it lovingly.

“What are we doing?” Beth whispers, before Ellie silences her with another kiss, her fingers reaching to slip under Beth’s blouse. She wanted to touch her so badly. Pushing her to the bed, she kisses her against the nape of her neck, her hands reaching to cup a swollen breast. She teases her nipples, her thumbs making circular motions, rendering the nipples erect. Beth moans, amazed at how fast Ellie found her spots. Ellie pushes up Beth’s blouse, and with a few flicks of her fingers, she removes her bra, and cups her breasts in her hands for a moment. Her fingers run down her sides, noting all of Beth to her memory. She rests her palms on the small swell for a moment, then slides her hand in between Beth’s thighs. She slips a hand inside her panties, noting that Beth was wet. Ellie looks up at Beth, who was red with embarrassment. 

“Don’t be, Bethy...it’s the hormones. When I was pregnant with Fred, I was perpetually horny.” 

Beth nibbles against Ellie’s shoulder, and looks up her eyes beaming.”I’ve never had this with either of my last two pregnancies.”

Ellie smiles. “Maybe it’s because it’s been what now, how long since you had a good fuck?”

“I’ve lost count.”

She sighs, kissing Ellie’s lips. Ellie slips her hand in Beth’s panties once more, teasing her clit with her fingers. Beth moans, her fingers entangled in Ellie’s mass of curls. Oh god, she loved those curls.Her fingers play with them, then slide downward, and she throws her arms around Ellie’s neck fingers waiting at a moment’s notice to pounce. Carefully, Ellie slips her fingers in, gently thrusting...and at the feeling of Ellie doing so, a guttural moan escapes Beth’s lips. 

“Oh, Christ Ellie...don’t stop,” was all that could escape from her lips. Beth hadn’t felt this in a long time. She had forgotten how different a woman was. Last time was in year ten, and all she remembered was the kiss and the breast touching. All those cosmos she read always said that women know intuitively where to go and what to do. Ellie seemed to know her quite well, hell they’ve been besties for years. Went through every trial and tribulation together. She wasn’t surprised in the slightest that this could happen. 

The thrusting increased gradually, and Beth’s breathing became shallow and labored. Ellie reaches in the nightstand and grabs the dildo.

Beth sees it and smiled. She was ready for her.

“Where did you find that? I’ve been looking for that for ages.”

Ellie smiles, putting her harness on. 

“In that box in the nightstand.”

She arches her back, inserting the toy carefully. “Oh fuck,” Beth says loudly and Ellie smiles, turned on at the sound of Beth’s moans and screaming and the frequency of cursing. She bites her lip, watching as Beth fights her release, gasping and loudly moaning. Her fingers scratching hard against Ellie’s bare shoulders, just enough to make her bleed. Ellie curses, and seethes at the pain. Beth notices, and looks down at the scratches. But right now she was too focused on sex. She needed a good fucking. 

Beth pulls the remnants of Ellie’s top off, pushing her closer to her. Still thrusting, Ellie increases the speed as Beth screams and moans at each thrust. Every five seconds she would even curse loudly at the feeling of the dildo inside her. She was feeling amazing right now. Beth marveled at Ellie’s breasts, cupping them in her hands. Hands sliding down her back and hips. Fingers running against her scars, lightly touching the raised markings. The swing set accident from when she was eight. Burn scars from Roman candles. Her fingers trace against scars of childbirth, much like the ones she shared. Pressing light kisses against them, she slips her hand between Ellie’s thighs, to which the woman moaned in response.

The moans turn to near screams as she feels the light movement of Beth’s fingers tracing against her most sensitive spots. Beth slips her hand out, licking her fingers with satisfaction. She could feel her orgasm building. Her toes curling with each current that electrified her. She bites her lip, trying to hold back. But, for how long? She couldn’t hold herself back any longer. She needed a release. 

“Beth,” Ellie says with bated breath…”I’m ready.”

Beth looks up with a smile, one that Ellie hadn’t seen in months. Smile of a mischievous woman. 

“Eleanor Miller, I love you.”

She releases, orgasming right on the spot with earth shattering screams whilst Ellie catches her breath from her own. Beth falls into Ellie’s arms, and Ellie cradles her, stroking her hair, pressing soft kisses against her neck.

“Bloody amazing, but for your information, you’re the only one who can call me that. No one else.” Beth laughs,burying her head in Ellie’s bare chest. Ellie smiles, holding her tight.

“We’ll get through this,”she says, pressing another kiss against her forehead.

Beth smiles. “I know. Just give me some time, Ellie. I’ve been through a lot this year...with Danny’s murder, Mark’s and my separation, and finding out I’m bringing another child into this mess. I’m sorry I’ve pushed you away for so long. I feel so bad for all the nasty things I’ve said and done,especially to you...how could you have ever known? Truthfully though, Ellie...grief does the weirdest fucking shit to you. I’m still struggling every day.”

Ellie puts the quilt over their naked bodies, and smiles. “I know. I love you too, Elizabeth.”

To which in that very moment, Beth smacks Ellie playfully. She loathed her full name.

They share eye contact again, and Beth throws her arms around Ellie, encompassing her in a long passionate kiss. 

“Hold me, won’t you?”

Ellie nods, spooning up behind Beth, wrapping her arms around her waist, fingers resting on her stomach.

She was content.


	2. Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fluffy fluff fluff

She feels the baby inside, kicking at her insides. 

“This little one won’t stop kicking about,” Beth says with a smile, her fingers tracing against her stomach. Ellie laughs, taking Beth in her arms.

“Let me feel,” she says, and Beth takes her hand and her own, placing both hands on her growing swell. Just as they did that, both women could feel a chain of fluttering about, and smiled.

“Fred was like that too. Kid could be a footballer by the way he kicked about.”

Beth smiles, nuzzling against Ellie’s shoulder. Ellie presses a kiss against Beth’s forehead. Beth was having a girl, she had found out recently. Ellie put the ultrasound pictures on the fridge, excited for Beth. Excited for the both of them. She feels another flutter, and smiles.

They shared a home near the beach, beautiful and rustic. The older children hardly spent time here, but they still had Fred, who enjoyed building enormous castles, only to stomp them out fast. At nearly two years old, he reminded Ellie of Tom. Fred even took to Beth, he enjoyed curling up in her lap as she read him stories and sometimes if her morning sickness wasn’t too bad, she’d take him on the beach, watching him splash around and then proceed to splash her, grinning as he dumped another bucket of water over Beth’s head. She’d smile, and press the little boy into her arms hugging him tightly. He’d giggle, and she’d pick him up, carrying him inside. Ellie would smile, knowing that spending time with Fred was cathartic for Beth. She was just glad that he liked her. Fred didn’t like many adults, he was a good judge of character. But he took to Beth fast and she loved spending time with him. He knew that soon enough he’d have a playmate...and he was equally as excited as Ellie. Some days, Ellie would be cooking dinner, and she’d go out to check on Fred, finding him with Beth. She was reading him another story, one of Danny and Chloe’s favorites and Fred seemed to enjoy it, giggling as Beth read in the character’s voices. Their glances meet, and Beth smiles.

“This book was their favorite. I’d read it so much the binding broke and I had to buy a new copy.”

Ellie nods, replying,”I’m just glad he likes it.”

Beth closed the book and smiled. “Me too.” She turns to Fred, and gives him a hug.

“Now go wash up for dinner. We can finish the story at bedtime,” she smiles as giggles erupted in the room. Holding out her hands to Ellie, she takes them and helps her up. Ellie sweeps her in her arms, her fingers resting against her stomach. She feels the fluttering of the baby moving about, and she smiles. 

“Have you thought of a name yet?”

Beth looks down at her swell, her fingers still unconsciously tracing it.

“Not yet. I sense it’s a girl. I’m to have ultrasound tomorrow to check on the vitals. Would you come with me, as support?”

Ellie places her hand against Beth’s cheek, kissing her gently.

“Of course. Now let’s get dinner started. Tom texted to tell me he and Chloe went out with some mutual friends, so it’s us and Fred here tonight. Chloe would have texted too, her mobile is charging... Tom did tell me she is with him and they’re safe. He drove her since we agreed they were sharing a car.”

“I just hope they don’t get into too much trouble. I worry a lot about them, especially Chloe. She’s gotten to be a handful at times since Danny’s murder and Mark and I separating. Boys, parties with lots of drinking and smoking, but somehow she still manages to ace her schoolwork.”

Ellie sets the dish on the table. “I know, I worry about Tom. He’s always got his door closed. They’re both good kids. They’ve just had a lot of upheaval the last three years, and each one is dealing with it differently.”

She leans over to kiss Beth, and Beth returns the kiss back, pulling Ellie closer to her.

“I love you, El.”

Ellie smiles. “I love you too Beth.”

Just as they were going to go in for another kiss, the timer went off. Breaking contact, she goes running to get their food out of the oven.

“Dinner is ready!”


End file.
